Monday, December 23, 2013

Day 23: My relationship with Music

 “I LOVE that artist but I would NEVER seem them in concert.” Yes, I say shit like that, all the time.

Pretty much everyone would agree that one of the most annoying things about me is how I feel about music. Annoying because my feelings seem to be inconsistent and contradictory and they contain Andrea Logic. Reasoning that only makes sense to me.

I love music. I mean does anyone really hate music? I may hate playing music (as in the piano) but I love listening to it. I love playing my favourite songs on my iTunes but not necessarily at an eardrum-bursting decibel, but as background music. Kind of like a white noise that accompanies my writing.

When I fall in love with a song, and like anything I fall in love with, I get a tad obsessive about it. I will listen to the same song like a hundred times in a row. But I can’t listen to the radio because it’s too repetitive. And I can’t stand the asinine banter between DJs and the ads make me want to do violent things. I hate ads! But most people know that, as that is why I haven’t been able to own a television in over 10 years. And when you get me in a room with a television I become immediately transfixed on the pretty moving pictures. Good luck trying to have a serious conversation with me if there is a tv present.

When I fall in love with an artist everything becomes about them. For example, Amon Tobin and I had a seven-year monogamous relationship. My longest yet! I was introduced to Amon Tobin and that was it, I was immediately smitten. I got all the albums I could get my hands on, even going to music stores and paying stupid prices for CDs. Then I found out he orchestrated the soundtrack for the video game Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory so I went and bought the game and borrowed a friend’s video game console and played the game non-stop. It was a bit weird, and not because it was a video game (love those), it just wasn’t my type of video game. I mean this game required stealth. I’m more of the throw myself into a room full of zombies and try to kill as many as I can before they eat my brains out kind of gal. 

Anyways, the point is, all I could do was listen to Amon Tobin, for years nothing else could penetrate the musical tastes of Andrea. Then I just stopped listening. Maybe because his music got weird, ok, I mean more weird. As in too weird I couldn’t even write to it anymore. Or my tastes changed. As they often do.

My tastes tend to go in unexpected directions. Like all of a sudden I give up meat and go vegetarian. Or I give up drinking and start running. Or ditch Amon Tobin and move on to Ellie Goulding. And now I’m in love with Ellie. And everything is about Ellie. I have a huge girl crush on Ellie. Just LOVE her.

And some things just don't differ over time. I do not like live music. So if Ellie comes to town and you buy me a ticket, I will turn around and sell it. Confused? I know. Mostly it is because I don’t like to be in crowds.  I’m just not big on being part of the herd. And then there is the fact I don’t like people being in my personal space. Or random people touching me, or breathing on me. Germs. Lots and lots of germs. It is weird because I do also follow the 5-second rule.

However I have been known to go watch a live show of my favourite artist if they are playing in a club. Where I’m allowed to move around and not be confined to a chair to sit and stare for 90 minutes. One of my best experiences at a show was watching Tricky at some obscure club in downtown Toronto. Where I was close enough to the stage I could feel his sweat hit my face. Apparently, germs aren’t a problem then either.

So even though I love Ellie right now, I won’t go see any of her shows if they are in a stadium. And to be honest, even if she was to play at a local club I probably would make some lame ass excuse to not go to that either. I guess it comes down to, that I love to enjoy music by myself where I can let my imagination flow uninterrupted. I want my own one-sided relationship with the artist. I don’t want them to dictate what I see of them either in a show, a video or an interview. But hey if Ellie ever wants to go for a run sometime, I’m totally up for that!


  1. Tricky would be damn awesome to see live. But I like Live Music, most of the time, don't mind crowds and sweaty mosh pits, most of the time.

    1. I do get obsessed with ear worms though. Listened to Lordes repetively recently. She just wouldn't get out of my head.

    2. Yes! Lorde is another one that has been on repeat lately. I love her voice!