Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Day 3: Ways I stay single without trying too hard

First off, I must say that if you don’t have a sense of humour please skip this post and move on to a more depressing one.  It is a myth that I’m not funny, I’m actually quite hilarious.

Ok, you’ve been warned, let’s continue with the post.

 “Andrea you are the most amazing awesome person I have ever met, I don’t understand how you are single.”

Not surprisingly, I get this statement a lot from people. What can I say, many people find it very upsetting that I am single, some have told me they think it is a sign of the apocalypse (those people may be crazy religious people, I’m not sure). Anyways I just hope if it is a sign of the apocalypse it’s not the zombie apocalypse because those never turn out well.

So for Day 3 of the Blog A Day ‘til X-mas Challenge, I will write this post to put an end to the mystery of my singleness.

Top 5 reasons I’m single:

#1 – I like being single right now – personally I think this is the only reason people need to know why I’m single, but apparently no one actually believes that I’m happy being single. So I came up with 4 more reasons for the non-believers.  

#2 – oblivious to flirting behaviour – apparently I have no idea that people are flirting with me or that I’m flirting with them. See I’m a friendly and sociable person, which apparently translates to some that I’m into them. Unfortunately, the reverse does not happen. You being friendly with me is not interpreted as flirting it is interpreted as you being friendly. Yeah, if you want me to know you are interested in me, you could, I don’t know, tell me that. Just saying.

#3 – too smart for my own good – I’ve been told my intelligence is a blessing and a curse and when it comes to dating it is a curse. I have had many guy friends say that they would never date me because I’m too smart. Apparently this bothers them because they could never get anything by me. Read, I would catch them in a lie. I have also been given advice to dumb myself down in order to score a man. And yeah, I would rather be single than do that. So there we go.

#4 – independent – just so we are clear this does not mean I would not be loyal in a relationship it just means I need my space! But honestly for all the headaches I get trying to explain to men that just because I need alone time doesn’t mean I don’t care I would rather be single.

#5 – self-involved – yeah, I like to think about me a lot right now, so much in fact there isn’t any room left for me to think about relationships. In fact, I am so into myself, that I have no problem even saying that, in my blog and out loud in the company of potential boyfriends. Take for instance, the other day in front of an extremely sexy perfectly matched man I admitted to only checking myself out on Facebook because I don’t have the inclination to see what other people are up to. I’m pretty sure this admission of self-involvement was not making him think “Andrea! She’s the one for me!” Yeah, pretty sure he wasn’t thinking that.

 So to recap, so there can be no confusion, I am single because I’m awesome and I’m happy in my current state of awesomeness.  Possibly it may be because I’m a tad self-involved…

Mystery solved.

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