Sunday, June 28, 2015

How to be Patient - An Andrea Choose Your own Adventure

A funny thing happened the other day, someone refered to me as "patient".

It takes patience to pick just the right filter for this shot
And no, they were not referring to me as a patient, of perhaps a local mental health center, but they were in fact referring to me as embodying the characteristic of patience. For ease of storytelling, I will refer to this person who referred to me as patient as Intelligent Man #1 (IM1).

Option 1:

You are unaware that I am not known for my patience (just tuning in are we?!) so you choose to do some background reading on the topic, picking "The Art of Patience" - a post I wrote February 22, 2015 on the topic of patience.

Option 2:

You are well aware that I'm a not a patient person and you choose to read on...

 ***
It takes patience to grow pretty plants in your urban patio garden!

So someone thinks I'm patient! Super cool, right?! And there is no need to be an asshole and point out that IM1 probably thinks I'm patient because he has never actually met me in "real life" and perhaps has only had the pleasure of interacting with me via email.

That could be true, it may not be true. Kind of like will we ever know if God truly exists? Probably not, so we should really move on with the story and just assume that IM1 has actually met me.

Option 1:

You are pretty sure God exists and to prove that, you choose to conduct some evidence-based research on the topic, just to prove I'm wrong and you are right. So off you go down that rabbit hole, and we never hear from you again.

Option 2:

You don't care if God exists or not, you are pretty sure IM1 probably doesn't even exist but you don't care, you just want to read the rest of the damn blog post already! You choose to keep reading.

***
It takes patience to look this good


Ok...so here is how you do it...how to be patient (or at least appear to be patient)

Definition of patience (compliments of Dictionary.com).

Patience (in 3 parts)...

1.
the quality of being patient, as the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like.
ANDREA TIP: Basically if you are going to be annoyed, complain or lose your shit, aka be inpatient, don't do it around other people. If you are going to do those things, find an outlet for it that does not involve other people. For example, you could punch a punching bag as opposed to punching the offending person in the face.
 
2.
an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay:
to have patience with a slow learner.
ANDREA TIP: the easiest way to suppress something is to not have to suppress it in the first place. If you are one of those people who doesn't like delays, especially if they are out of your control, then you need to minimize the possibility of that happening. For example, to have patience with a slow learner...I will never be able to accept that slow learner, I don't care that they are slow and they are not capable of going faster, it is all unacceptable in my book. I am a perfectionist after all. And really that is why I am not a teacher.
3.
quiet, steady perseverance; even-tempered care; diligence:
to work with patience.

ANDREA TIP: it is best to spend a lot of time alone. Truth is, I am able to get the impossible done (have you seen me lately?!). And sure it takes a long time and a lot of work and patience! But if I seem to you like I accomplished something with a lot of grace and poise, it is probably because you didn't actually see me work on getting it done. Basically I did the majority of the work (i.e., the work that makes me swear a lot) locked in an office with the blinds shut.


It takes patience to raise a baby and thankfully not much to just hold one!
And so yes, perhaps IM1 has not had the pleasure of being around me 24/7 because yes then he would see a whole other side of me, but let's face it no one gets to see that side of me. And I think that in order to be patient or at least have others think you so, you just need to not expose them to that side of you.

And it isn't that you aren't being true to yourself, it is just you are being respectful of others and not subjecting them to your bullshit. After all we all have bullshit, the ones that seem like they don't, at least have the decency to not expose us to their bullshit. And we should thank them for that.


Congratulations! You made it to the end! You now know how to be patient!




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